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The Death of the Hipster (Happier than Death of a Salesman, We Promise)

Timeout called for the death of hipsterdom in 2007 - Dov kept the dream alive

The external threat of hipster retail terrorism failed to uproot American Apparel in Williamsburg but it now looks as if the internal mismanagement of American Apparel by owner Dov Charney may complete the retail terrorist’s work.

According to a recent BusinessWeek article, not only is “hipster over” but the clothier may be going the way of the poodle mini-skirt (hopefully just another Halloween costume). Nervous lenders and investors are beginning to doubt Charney’s ability to oversee the retail chain, leaving American Apparel with second-quarter losses somewhere between $5 million and $7 million. All in all, the company has approximately $91 million in debt.

This could be fate’s way of telling Dov that he should have hired “ugly people” or that he needs to stop being such a freakin’ pervert. But Charney stated in the BusinessWeek piece that he intends to remain the captain of the ship and pilot American Apparel into a new, preppier era as a “traditional American clothier” – but as we all know, any good captain understands that he must go down with the ship and Charney seems to be heading straight for an iceberg with the “traditional American” angle.

Currently, there are four American Apparel locations in BK, which is way too many as is. So if they close, Brooklyn, what does that mean for you? Well, for one, if you’re going to dress like this, you should at least make it up on your own. I mean, let’s get real, what does American Apparel have that your local thrift store doesn’t. The neon might be a bit more faded and the staff might not be as hot – yeah, we will all miss Faye Reagan as an ad model (worry not, she is still on Brazzers . . . ) – but you will be just fine, rest assured.

Faye Reagan, American Apparel by day, Brazzers pornstar by night

I think it is safe to say that all we would really miss are the ads.

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