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Local Goose Claims Euthanization Better than Other Outcomes in the NY Area

Local Goose Gives Thumbs Up!

If you are a goose and you reside within a seven mile radius of JFK and La Guardia, beware. They are coming for you.

In a grizzly turn of events, 400 flightless fecal-matter production units (otherwise known as Canadian Geese) from Prospect Park were rounded up and exterminated in a bid to keep them out of the jaws of the larger and ever-hungry aluminum human transport units.

A remaining goose was asked his thoughts on the matter and said he was “not sure what is worse, living in a park where humans use them for cross-bow practice, taking to the air and being turned into pâté by jet engines (18th second), or calmly rounded up and put to sleep.” He quickly added after a moment of contemplation that the “nap doesn’t sound so bad in comparison to the other likely outcomes.”

Although a memorial service has yet to be planned for the Prospect Park clan, similar incidences in liberal enclaves in Oregon have resulted in a service where “individuals can meet to offer their prayers, play music or participate in moments of silence for the geese.” Here’s to you, Goose.

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  • The steel deck arche #bridge 660 feet above the #Rio #Grande #Gorge - It is the tenth highest bridge in the US. About ten miles from #Taos NM. Some barb wire fence may have been bypassed for the shot.
  • Abandoned, #rusted and #faded little amusement park next to #Quartz Mountain in #Oklahoma. I didn't know Oklahoma had mountains either.
  • A category F5 #tornado ripped through #Moore #Oklahoma about a month ago. You see it on tv, hard to comprehend when you walk around in the aftermath.
  • The pool didn't open until 11am, but swimming at sunrise could not be passed up. #nofilter #roadtrip
  • Here's looking at you girl. Odd decoration inside Craigs BBQ in De Valls Bluff Arkansas.
  • Good afternoon #Memphis - Sun Studios where Johnny Cash, Howlin' Wolf, BB King, Elvis Presley amongst many others cut records.
  • Dukes of #Hazzard General Lee #Dodge #Charger at the movie car museum in Jackson TN
  • Real hot, damn hot. Accidentally found this #swimming hole right in time. Somewhere between #Nashville and #Memphis. #roadtrip #lake
  • I loved you, #Nashville but the show must go on. #roadtrip
  • Frazier Ave and Tremont St., #Chattanooga #Tennessee - Mural of Charles #Babbage, Nikola #Tesla, Alan #Turing, Vannevar Bush, Claude Shannon, Steve Jobs
  • When you're traveling with no particular place to be on a #roadtrip, you may find yourself, awaking in a #Buddhist retreat in the middle of the #Smoky #Mountains
  • Good morning Bryson City, NC. Smoky Mountains Railroad engine #1751.
  • 11 mile loop trail. Swimming hole. Rope swing. No board shorts. No problem.
  • Road side shack selling boiled goobers. Near Fontana Lake on Hwy 19 in NC.
  • Hello, Asheville.
  • Starving horse on the side of the Blue Ridge in North Carolina. Gave him a couple bags of granola, but that ain't shit to an animal his size. Calling animal services. If you can't feed him you shouldn't own him.
  • Kim France and Jon Davis pickin and grinnin at Uncle Lee's Bar•B•Q inside the Old Hampton Store in Linville, North Carolina. I've never seen a guy bend strings like that.  #roadtrip
  • The #cascades in North Carolina. Just off the Blue Ridge Parkway. #waterfall #roadtrip
  • Mabry Mill on the Blue Ridge Parkway
  • You need a biscuit. Downtown #Roanoke Virginia.

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